It’s midnight here in England and I am in bed scrolling through pictures. Pictures of my school prom, my 18th birthday, Christmases and nights out. I love looking through old photos, especially seeing how much slimmer I was! I like looking back at how happy I was with my friends back then… friends who I no longer have. It’s usually a nice feeling but tonight it feels different. All I can think about it how much I wish my boyfriend was in these pictures. I wish I’d have been with him so that he could have experienced all of this with me. These are pictures he’s never seen and stories he’s never heard.
I’ve been with him tonight so maybe that’s why these thoughts are in my head. Kind of like when you see somebody and then that night you have a dream about them? All I know is it feels strange not seeing him in these pictures. I know he wasn’t there so it shouldn’t feel strange and I was actually in other relationships when these photos were taken but it’s strange that he never got to experience life with me in these moments. I was a completely different person back then and I wish he’d have known that person.